![]() As he was being taken to his place of eternal torment, he passed a room where a lawyer was having sex with a beautiful woman. “What is this?” the latter asks without looking. The first lawyer shoves something into the other one’s hand. While one of the robbers takes the money from the tellers, the other lines the customers, including the lawyers, up against a wall and proceeds to take their wallets, watches and other valuables. Two lawyers are in a bank when, suddenly, two armed robbers burst in. Arguing with a lawyer is like wrestling with a pig in mud - sooner or later, you realize they like it.ĩ. “Give me a beer, and I’ll have a lawyer for my gator.”Ĩ. A man walked into a bar with his alligator and asked the bartender, “Do you serve lawyers here?” “Sure do,” replied the bartender. ![]() Judge, I can’t fool even one woman, so I know I can’t fool eight of them.”ħ. “When I pleaded ‘not guilty,’ I didn’t know women would be on the jury. When the judge asked why, the defendant pointed to the eight women and four men in the jury box. A defendant who had pleaded guilty saw the jury that had been empaneled, and he announced that he was changing his plea to guilty. RELATED: 45 Best Riddles For Kids That Won’t Be Too Hard To SolveĦ. Finally, he yelled, “Quick, call a lawyer!” “A lawyer? Why?” “We need someone who speaks their language.” Frantically, the keeper tried everything but couldn’t get the slippery animals back into their cages. Someone mistakenly left the cages open in the Reptile House at the zoo, and there were snakes slithering all over the place. How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they’d rather keep their clients in the dark. With his lawyer’s assistance, he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses.” The defendant smiled. “Using your logic, I sentence the defendant’s arm to one year’s imprisonment. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb.” “Well put,” the judge replied. A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. “The bad news is, your blood is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it.” “What’s the good news?” “Your cholesterol is 130.” 3. The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news.” “What’s the bad news?” asks the accused. RELATED: 100+ Hard Riddles That Will Make You Think Twiceġ. It’ll put a smile on their face so big, everyone will think they won their case. So, if you know a lawyer or a law student, text a couple of these jokes their way. These counselors of law lead pretty serious lives and sometimes handle grave situations. You may not need a lawyer, but everyone can appreciate a good joke about one. You don’t need a law degree to get these jokes. She takes the bar exam in 2022.) So, if your knowledge of legislation begins and ends with Law and Order, that’s OK. Law is such a rewarding career even Kim Kardashian has taken it up. ![]() The path to becoming a lawyer isn’t easy, but Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother sure makes it look like fun. Guilty as charged! Consider these jurisprudential jests exhibits A through, uh, 101. This is why, well, we sometimes like to kick back and enjoy a little laughter at your expense, also known as lawyer jokes. If this just so happens to be your chosen profession, don’t take it personally (sidebar: no litigation necessary). Let’s be honest lawyers make easy targets when it comes to humor. ![]()
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